waiter vendorsWedding planning is full of surprises. Who knew your aunt would insist on a minibar in her hotel room, or that your cousin would need a sitter for her four kids? Your brother's girlfriend is a vegan with a peanut allergy, and you need to find a highly-rated local groomer for your best man's emotional support dog. 

You're a bride, not a concierge... but nonetheless, you still have some obligations as a hostess. Thankfully, looking after your vendors is pretty straightforward... and yep, they do need a little day-of love. Most of our advice follows traditional vendor etiquette, but we've thrown in some common-sense tips our wedding bands have picked up from clever Music Garden clients. 

Even wedding band cats need herding

Your band will plan their sets around your schedule, so be sure you provide them with a timeline for the day. Don't worry about planning out every minute; your wedding will take on a life of its own—but interrupting the band mid-song for a toast or cake-cutting is awkward for everyone, and your day will have a better flow if you choose the right soundtrack to set the mood for special scheduled events. 

But sometimes, a special family guest might need to leave before the moment for which you'd planned that bride/great-great-grandfather dance, or another unexpected twist to your schedule will require your band to rally. Every bride should appoint a friendly, assertive, preferably sober person to help alert vendors of these change-ups, or... and this is important... to intervene when an overzealous guest decides to be the unofficial MC. Our bands are great at professionally finessing mildly unruly guests, but all vendors expect intervention by someone from the bride's camp if things get out of hand. 

Your vendors need to eat, too!

Plan to provide food and refreshments to all vendors who spend a significant portion of the day at your wedding. Catering companies typically include their staff's meals as part of their pricing structure, but when you sign contracts for these vendors, make sure you're clear on your responsibilities for fueling up the folks who make your big day happen:

  • Wedding band and entertainers, including set-up staff and assistants
  • Wedding photographer, videographer, and assistants
  • Wedding coordinator
  • Florists (full-service floral decorators deserve a meal while they're setting up)
  • Hair and makeup stylists
  • Limo and shuttle drivers on standby
  • Officiant

You can set aside a table or two for your vendors, but they don't need to be seated with the rest of your guests. Out-of-the-way accommodations are fine, as long as your photographer and videographer can keep an ear out for spontaneous moments. (Our photographer friends say that, aside from toasts, they like to eat when the guests are eating. Nobody wants photos of people chewing food!)

Before finalizing arrangements with your caterer, check with your vendors for a last-minute head count, as well as any special dietary needs. Your vendors aren't entitled to cake... but they definitely deserve hot, high-quality meals. 

If you want an in-depth, on-the-nose, and hilariously off-color take on feeding your vendors, check out Scarlet Plan & Design's blog post on the subject. 

Tipping: It's not just what Uncle Bob does after too much champagne

Review your vendor contracts so you know exactly when balances are due, and be sure to have payment ready for settling up on your wedding day. Traditional etiquette dictates that the best man hands off any day-of payments, even if the couple or their parents are footing the bill. You shouldn't have to worry about messing with business at your own wedding!

These vendors expect tips, typically 15 to 20 percent for the business or $25 to $50 for each staff member if gratuity isn't included in the booking price:

  • Drivers and valets
  • Bartenders, food servers, and on-site catering chefs, if gratuity isn't included
  • Cake delivery staff
  • Hair and makeup stylists 
  • Band members and crew

On-site employees of photo, video, and planning companies may not expect tips but appreciate them, as do vendors operated by sole proprietors.

All wedding vendors love to receive positive reviews on wedding sites, Google, and on their Facebook pages. Hashtagging them (and giving them props) on your Twitter and Instagram feeds is greatly appreciated!

Take care of your vendors, because they take care of you!

Photographers seem to be in three places at once, servers are running around like mice with their tails on fire, and your wedding band is shaking it up while they're getting your guests off their feet. The best weddings leave everyone "feeling it" the next day, even if nobody spiked the lemonade, and your vendors work hard to make you happy. Reward them for a job well done!

Do you want to find a band that's worth their weight in wedding food? Contact us at Music Garden, where we have bands of every genre, for every occasion. Our contracts are straightforward, but we're always willing to make adjustments for brides who think outside the box. Be sure to check out our blog for wedding planning tips, and don't hesitate to ask if you have more questions about the care and feeding of wedding vendors! 

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